Searching for Real Passion

Assalamua'laikum wbt & Good Day,

 

In life, there'll come one day when we finally realize that we are not living in the life that we desire. We realize that most of the things we do is out of our passion.

 

We keep on doing the same thing everyday. Again and again. Until we reach one level when we suddenly realize that "this is not what I wish", and  "this is not the life that I want".

 

Somehow, we might think that everything has been too late. But actually life has so much to offer. Yes, we may begin doing something that we are passionate about in a quite old age. After all, it is always better late than never.

Rizal Park, Manila, Philippines

 

Looking back on the old days, I was hoping that I will become a teacher when I grow up. But as time goes by, I find that being a teacher is not really interest me as my own mother is also a teacher. I realized that being involved with many people for quite long time may cause me severe headache; although there is a moment where I need to reach some people to have some deep talk. *that's how ambivert I am*

 

Then, I started fall in love with doctor because I like and score well in my Biology. And Alhamdulillah, during my last year of high school, there is an event called International Conference of Medicine at Putrajaya International Conference Centre and all MRSMs need to send their Top 10 students for that conference. And somehow, the reality of doctor's life does not impressed me at all. I rethink back on my real passion after that conference. And for your info, only two out of ten of us who went to that conference choose to be a doctor today. *such a waste of investment* :P

 

Only when few of us were selected to fill in Skim Pelajar Cemerlang (SPC) application form upon our SPM trial results were released that I think that I want to become an engineer. During that time, I never know that engineering course actually need us to have a strong foundation in Additional Mathematics; one of the subjects that I am not interested in. And finally, I enrolled myself in Chemical Engineering course at one of the local universities under this scheme.

In front of Manila Post Office Building, Philippines

 

The story of my so-called passion haywire doesn't end there. Upon secured myself by getting an employment at one of oil and gas main players and sit for technical post for 2.5 years, I think that engineering is not my passion. In addition, I want to get myself out from my current section on that time since that section needs to relocate to other city of Sarawak. I transferred to other department since then. And it was the worst decision that I ever made since that department really bring out the worst of me instead of getting out the best in me.

 

And today, I still searching for my other passions other than in investment and financial related matters.

 

Sometimes, I wish that I just sitting on my sofa and monitor the stocks daily trending.

 

Sometimes, I wish that I can travel around the world and keep on leaving at different countries each month and read my favourite books.

 

Sometimes, I wish I can be promoted faster and take charge in business and strategic planning for my current company.

 

Sometimes, I wish I have ample time and keep inspires to write and publish my own books.

 

Sometimes, I wish I am an excellent investor like Warren Buffet.

Sometimes, I wish I am an expert baker, owning my own exclusive bakery.

 

And sometimes, I do wish that I am an intelligent housewife, excellent mommy and supportive wife to a husband.



Chinatown Walk, Manila, Philippines

 

And today, I realized that having my own internal conflict is the hardest conflict among all.

 

Allah, guide me every single day. And all of the readers. :')

 

Have a nice day.

 

Wassalam.